Our Annual (...kinda) Family Letter

Greetings from the Borst Family in Tampa Florida!
We hope this letter finds you in the new year of 2012 doing better than 2011. Our 2011 was quite full as we know most of yours probably was as well. Take heart, the Mayans said the world would end this year… so don’t worry about 2013. Live it up this year in 2012!
Our lives in 2011 revolved around family, church, and school. We took trips to Longmont, Colorado to see Troy’s grandmother and family, Atlanta to see Kelly’s parents, and Houston to see Troy’s parents. It was a full year of trips to see family. The kids each spent a week at Lake Aurora Christian Camp in Lake Wales, Florida and loved it. They all started a new school in the fall… a charter school in downtown Tampa which has turned out to be a complete blessing for all three kids and a great step as they will open middle school grades next year. New Beginnings Christian Church always keeps us busy and is the hub of friends and activities.

You all of course want to know about the kids first. Abigail is 10 and doing great in 5th grade. Abby concluded her interest in Girl Scouts so you all will need to find a new source for cookies this year. She just won the Science Fair for the second year in a row for her grade and will be heading to the countywide Science Fair in February. Her project this year was a blind taste test of different apple varieties. She is  looking to be “Superior” two years in a row! She is an avid reader and will be making great use of the Kindle she received for Christmas. She is also looking forward to trying cheerleading with UpWard Sports in 2012.
Nathanael is 9 and in the 4th grade. He loves Super Heroes, building things, and enjoys sports whenever he can play. He recently wrote a descriptive piece about being a Paleontologist when he grows up… after being Iron Man. We’ll have to see how things work out. The rest of us think he will be an architect. Nate is looking forward to getting back on a regular team in 2012 as he will try out basketball with UpWard Sports. Dad, Nate, and Ian have been shooting a little hoop in front of the house to prepare. Nate is beginning to enjoy reading more and more and just finished a book about the sinking of the Titanic.

Ian is 8 and in the 2nd grade. He is our video game guru and beats everyone else in the house at most video games. His dad can still school him every so often which comes as quite a surprise to him. Ian is the most outgoing and friendly child and is always surrounded by a cloud of friends no matter where he is. Ian also loves to read and is into the “Secret of Droon” series as well as the “Magic Treehouse” books. His #1 request for Christmas was a Gamestop gift card followed by a Barnes & Noble gift card. He will use them both soon after Christmas. Ian will also try out basketball like Nate and thinks he will do pretty good on the team.

Kelly is thoroughly enjoying her new job with Bayshore Baptist church in South Tampa. It was a great move for her personally and spiritually which allows her to pick up the kids from school and have a better schedule. It is certainly less stressful and brings more meaning to her work day. She was blessed with this job after praying over Psalm 84:10, “Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.” She still enjoys leading women’s Bible studies at the church and even branched out for a few non-Beth Moore studies. Shocking! In 2012, she will return to her Beth Moore roots which will be great for all involved. One of the highlights for Kelly was organizing a successful women’s conference at church called ‘Fresh Start’ which enabled women to enter the workforce with confidence (and a new outfit) with our youth minister's wife.

Troy is busy but balanced. He is the Associate Minister at the church and will begin to transition to the Senior Minister role within a few years. He is on the downward slide of his PhD with Regent University in Virginia Beach, Virginia and also began to teach Public Speaking for Florida Christian College in Orlando this year. Getting this instructor position marks the first in a long line of bucket list items he checked off this year. He also fought in the US Open Karate tournament and lost, but plans to fight again several times in 2012. He also self-published five books for the Amazon Kindle, with a few more in the works (another bucket list item… sort of). Troy and Kelly also lost over 80 pounds between them and are sporting slimmer figures with more hard work and pounds lost to come in 2012. In 2012, he also plans to flesh out two fictional works which have been brewing in his mind.
2012 for us holds great promise. Organized sports, a Bahamas Missions trip, concluded coursework for a PhD, weight loss, camps, trips, the NACC in Orlando, and things not yet dreamed of are on our agenda. All of it must be taken on faith… right? James 4:13-15 says, “Now listen, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.’ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, ‘If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.’ So, in view of that, if the Lord wills it, we will complete our plans, but in all things we will let Him direct our ways. We wonder what He has in store for us. For you? If the Lord wills it, we hope to do all we have planned and more.

May your 2012 be full of promise! And, by the way, just ignore the Mayans.


(written by Troy)

FAB: New Favorite Blogs

I hope you all are reading the fabulous blogs by our NBCC family like Seconds and Esther's Blessing.  I also want to share with you all some blogs that have recently become my favorites!! I think you will find one to love!

I love The Dating Divas! The dating divas are married women who are committed to keeping the romance in their marriages by dating their husbands. Eleven women share a different date idea each week and fun stuff in between. It's fun and encourages me to think about ways to focus on my marriage.

The Girl Who Ate Everything has some great recipes! I found her on Pinterest (obsessed with that, yet? Let me know if you need an invite).

Plain Chicken is another recipe site that I found on Pinterest.  The recipes are easy to follow and have been delicious!!

I get my fashion fix at Polyvore. It is full of outfit ideas.  Another Pinterest find, most of the fashion ideas that are repinned come from Polyvore!

For the guys...check out "husbands", a user's guide. I know there is a grammatical error in the title, and it should be a blog for wives to understand husbands.  Honestly, that almost disqualified the blog from my favorites list. But the content is too good not to share. This blog has Biblical encouragment for husbands. I was really impressed with the writer's honesty and the topics he tackles. Definitely worth the time, guys!

Check them out and let me know what you think!!!

FAB: Christmas Fashion

So, December has rolled around and, for some reason, many people lose their fashion minds around this time of year.  Bad fashion choices are made in the name of holiday spirit, and I find myself saying oh...bless her heart more than normal.  There are contests for the ugliest Christmas sweater all over the place, but sadly, you can participate in one by purchasing a sweater next to well meaning shoppers who are excited about the good deal they are getting and plan to proudly wear the sweater to a party that night.  So far this season, I have seen ill fitting sweaters, t-shirts with animals, and what can only be described as festive pajamas. Oy Vay.

SO, how can we survive this season and still look as fabulous as we are?!?!?!? Here are some tips:

• Don't feel stuck choosing between green and red. I think there are several colors that say holiday. Black, cream, or purple. I would stick to vibrant jewel tones but even a hot pink is fun and festive. In fact, assuming most people will be wearing red or green, you can make an amazing statement with a different color. Imagine how beautifully you will stand out in royal blue! Remember a color that suits you will look better than any holiday color...which leads to tip number 2.
• If you do go with red or green, make sure you choose a shade that looks good with your skin tone and coloring. There is a shade in the red or green family that looks good on you. Red can have blue undertones or orange undertones. Green can have blue or yellow undertones. Make sure your red or green is highlighting your face.
• Use the fabric to dress up your outfit. Go for a silk, satin, or chiffon instead of a jersey knit.
• Bling your outfit out!! The holidays are a perfect excuse to pile on the bling (tastefully). I know some fabulous jewelry ladies who can help you out with that...
• Speaking of bling: try metallics! Don't go overboard but metallics can really dress up an outfit!

Here are a few really cute holiday options from party attire to a casual holiday get together:

faithful love

Right now, our Bible study is reading Francis Chan's book Crazy Love.  I must say that I love it and am learning tons.  I find myself recognizing the way I feel about God in his challenging reminder that this life should be marked by love.  Last night's discussion on chapters 5 and 6 is still resonating with me. 
In chapter 5, we were confronted with the reality that the lukewarm Christian is non-existent.  You cannot be both.  Giving God the leftovers in our lives is not only not enough but evil.  He is not content being a tack on to our lives.  Chan raises the question...do you love Jesus more than anything else in life?  It really is a confrontational question when you consider your husband or your children or your parents or...isn't it?  I think we often talk a big game and say we love Jesus more...but do you really?  Does the way you spend your time, your money, your efforts, your thoughts, your actions, your words reflect a heart deeply in love with Jesus?
In chapter 6, Chan makes the point that if our pursuit is loving Jesus, we won't sin. The pursuit of Jesus and the pursuit of sin are mutually exclusive.  You cannot do both at the same time.  Every choice to sin comes down to what do you love more: Jesus or that sin?  If we went through our day thinking like that...recognizing that choice, we would definitely either sin less, feel guilty all the time, or, at the very least, not be so surprised when we are standing before the throne and hear "I never knew you." 
This way of seeing relationship with Jesus is how I try to explain my view of Christianity to my rule-following husband.  Troy would say that the Word of God is a list of dos and don'ts.  I think the Word of God is a description of the type of heart God desires those who have chosen to be His to have.  I have chosen to be His...I want to act like it.  Rules indicate obedience because you recognize the authority of the one who set the rule.  I want my relationship with Jesus to be about obedience flowing from a heart that loves Him more than I love anything else.
Think about it...in a marriage relationship.  Wives, we want our husbands to remain faithful, right?  But isn't it of more value if our men stay faithful not because they should but because they are so caught up in us that nothing can distract them from their love for us. It is not about keeping the rule. It is about his love for me.
It is the same with God. He desires us to be faithful because of our love for Him...not because we should.  We get so caught up in not jeopardizing our salvation that we miss the point of relationship. If I divorce her, can I still go to heaven? Does God still love me if I live with my boyfriend? Am I ok if I lie all the time? Cursing won't keep me from heaven...will it? If we viewed our lives as an opportunity to show Jesus how much we love Him instead of testing the boundaries of His acceptance, maybe we would experience the abundant life He promises.
So, this week I am challenging myself to examine what I love and surrender it all to the authority of Jesus.  I am challenging myself to stop and ask the question: do I love Jesus more than whatever willful sin I want to commit?  I am challenged to make my life match my words.  I love Jesus more than anything in this life. He deserves more than the leftovers of my heart.

Great Devotion by Lysa TerKeurst

October 27, 2011

You Don’t Like Me

Lysa TerKeurst

“Do not be anxious about anything…” Philippians 4:6 (ESV)

“You are not liked.”

“Who are you to think you could do that?”

“Why did you say that? Everyone thinks you’re annoying.”

“Your kids just illustrated every inadequacy you have as a mom.”

“You are invisible.”

Have you ever been taunted by these thoughts? I have. Why do we let such destructive words fall hard on our souls? Toxic thoughts are so dangerous because they leave no room for truth to flourish. And in the absence of truth, lies reign.

The other day I was discussing something with my husband and I said, “I know you think I’m being annoying and overly protective about this but…”

He stopped me and said, “How do you know that’s what I’m thinking? Please don’t hold me liable for saying things that are really only thoughts in your mind.”

Wow. He’s so right. He hadn’t said those things. I was assuming he was thinking them and operating as if those toxic thoughts were reality.

I think we girls do this way too often. People aren’t thinking about us and assessing us nearly as much as we think they are.

As Christian women we should hold our thoughts to a higher standard. How dare these run away thoughts be allowed to simply parade about as if they are true and manipulate us into feeling insecure, inadequate, and misunderstood! Oh how much trouble we invite into our lives based on assumptions. We are instructed:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me – practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:6-9 NIV 1984)

This is probably a verse you’ve read before. But, have you thought of applying it to your every thought…especially the toxic ones?

We are to think on, ponder and park our minds on constructive thoughts—not destructive thoughts. Thoughts that build up not tear down. Thoughts that breathe life not drain the life from us. Thoughts that lead to goodness not anxiety.

So, here are three questions we’d do well to ask ourselves when thoughts are dragging us down.

1. Did someone actually say this or am I assuming they are thinking it?

If they actually said it, deal with it then. If I’m assuming it, that’s unfair to them and unnecessarily damaging to me. Instead of staying anxious, I need to seek truth by seeking God and asking Him for peace.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

2. Have I been actively engaging with truth lately?

The more we read God’s truths and let truth fill our mind, the less time we’ll spend contemplating untruths.

Thinking run-away, worrisome thoughts invites anxiety. Thinking thoughts of truth wraps my mind in peace and helps me rise above my circumstances.

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

3. Are certain situations or friendships feeding my insecurities?

If so, maybe I need to take a break from these for a season. I need to seek friendships that are characterized by truth, honor, and love.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Good gracious I know this is tough stuff. I know these issues can be more complicated than three simple questions. But it’s a good place to start holding our thoughts accountable.

After all, how a woman thinks is often how she lives.

I think we need to read that one again, don’t you? How a woman thinks is often how she lives. May we think upon and live out truth—and only truth today.

Dear Lord, reveal to me untruths throughout my day that can so easily distract and discourage me. Help me see You and Your truth in all I do. You have taught that only Your truth will set me free. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

2 Poems by My Favorite Author

As For Me As for me and my house
We will serve the Lord.
As for me and my walk
Christ and I are in one accord.
As for me and my heart
Inside is only love.
As for me and my sight
It will only look above.
As for me and my brain
Christ will always be the thought.
As for me and my sin,
That, Christ has already bought.
As for me and my zeal,
Only for Christ it will be.
As for me and my chains,
Christ has set me free
 
Walking the Road

I’m walking along the lonely road
Not a care to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

What should I say? What should I believe?
He says He died for me
Me, I say?
Your sins I died to relieve.

I’m walking along the lonely road
Many cares to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

It’s my way, I know where I am going
It’s my life, my vocation, my route
I can row my own boat thank you
I know where the river’s flowing.
I’m walking along the lonely road
Many cares to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

He comes to me again, a hard time in life…
He comforts me when I tell Him not to
Who is this Man to me?
I realize that He is not just a Man
Who died for me long ago
Lord Jesus be my Guide, and please set me free.

by Troy Borst

Our Words...yikes!

I read this in a blog recently:

Beth Moore had quoted Melissa (her daughter) as saying that most of the time what we mean by ‘real’ is something negative. That struck me like a ton of bricks because something very similar was already in my teaching notes for that night and I took it as divine affirmation I was potentially on the right track.
The point I suggested was that if we find ourselves ending sentences with “I’m just saying”, it may be that what we just said wasn’t our just being real, it was our being real mean. The one who prides herself on ‘telling it like it is” may just need to repent of hatefulness rather than glory in her plain-spokenness. If we are fully aware that we are abrasive and hurting feelings on a regular basis, it’s not the public-at-large’s responsibility to learn to deal with us and our ‘authenticity’. Does that mean our criticisms are unfounded? Not always. But there is a world of difference between speaking truth in love and spewing the truth in hate.

I saw Beth's original tweet with Melissa's comment about people who are being "real" and loved it, but Lisa's following comments just further emphasized the truth of Melissa's words.  Sometimes we think that people who say what everyone else is thinking are refreshing.  But I wonder if the reason everyone else is just thinking it and not saying it is because it is hurtful.
What we like about people who say those often painful truths is that the words were said but that we don't take the hit as having said it.  Often those that "tell it like it is" tout the quality as being brave enough to speak the truth.  I love that Lisa points out the the criticism is often founded.  Harsh words maybe truthful, but are they beneficial?
This past week in Bible study we were studying and then talked about being disciplined.  One area that we talked about having Godly discipline is our words.  Talk about a challenge...especially for women.  Learning to control the tongue is so difficult.  Scripture speaks to it in so many places but so clearly here in James.

James 3:2-12 We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.  All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. 

Even if you can slow yourself and your emotions down enough to think through encounters you know will be difficult or give opportunity to glorify the flesh rather than God, the reactionary words...ones spoken before they are thought about, will just about kill you if you are consiously trying to change the way you speak.  I have tried to learn to ask myself if what I want to say is beneficial to the person or situation involved.  I am trying to learn to stop and think...pray and ask that question when my immediate emotional reaction feels ungodly. Those two disciplines can be so frustrating because I often end up unable to say what I think or feel...but I guess if my thoughts and feelings were not beneficial or Godly I should be ok with that, huh?  I don't want to say them.
Sometimes, there are hard things that should be said in love and trying to figure out when those times are is hard.  I have learned to pray that God would show me when He wants me to speak by having the other person ask my opinion.  So many times that never happens. They never ask. But, sometimes, we are the person God wants to use to speak His Truth into a situation, and they will ask...then, it is right.  I remember there was one case where someone I love was really wandering far from the Lord. I had such a broken heart over it for my Savior.  I prayed so many times God help me keep my mouth shut until Your time if that ever or never comes.  And then one day he asked me what I thought...I went bug-eyed.  I looked at Troy.  He laughed and said that's what you have been waiting for...go ahead.  The conversation was so blessed by God.
I don't want to be pleased when someone else is hurt by words...mine or someone else's.  The telling it like it is moment of satisfaction is not worth the slip in being disciplined with my words.  A brave woman is a woman of Godly discipline who speaks with love in His time.  I'm just sayin...

Surrendering Hurt Feelings???

So, last night my feelings were hurt.  I got hit right in the love language =(  I'd like to say that I was over it quickly...but that's obviously not the case since I am blogging it this morning.  And, unfortunately, it is going to get worse before it gets better. I think that I understand His purpose in this particular hurt, but understanding doesn't make the situation hurt less. What I would like to know is where do I take this hurt?  How can I react in a way that glorifies God when my feelings are hurt?  How do I cast my cares on Him?  How do I take on His easy yoke and light burden?  I understand that I need to surrender my hurt feelings to Him.  But how do I do that?  No, really...I'm asking.  I've prayed, consulted Scripture, talked it out...how do I surrender these feelings?

Wouldn't it be nice if we could go through life without ever getting our feelings hurt?  Sounds like heaven to me!

It's all good...

I have been thinking a lot about the goodness of God recently.  It is easy to think God is good when things are good.  My life is really good right now.  My kids are happy and making quality friendships with little people who have parents that Troy and I adore.  Troy is chasing professional dreams.  He is BUSY, but he is able to focus on himself right now.  After 2 years of focusing on our children, I know he is happy to be back to a more normal schedule that allows him to focus on work and school.  I LOVE my new job...not a little - a lot.  Good people, fun tasks and laughter...I love the church.  Being there restores my soul.
But what about when life is not good?  When life is hard, do I trust in the goodness of God?  Knowing that God is good is different than feeling that God is good.  When circumstance weigh us down with stress, discontent, unhappiness, depression, frustration, despair, grief, regret, sadness, anger...do I view my life through the heart, mind and eyes of someone who knows that God is good?  That is what faith is, right?  Living life with the knowledge that God is good, that He loves you and that He wants us to know His goodness in abundance.
God is always good...but He is not always sweet.  We face bitter circumstances...life is full of hard things.  Can I believe that God is good even when He is not sweet?  When death comes, when time passes with no answer, when people I love hurt, when provision doesn't come...even then do I know that He is good?  That He is being good to me...that He is working good for me?  Do I live standing firm in the head knowledge and the heart experience that He is not only sovereign but good?
I think that is the catch, isn't it?  He is sovereign.  He reigns.  He can do all things...including change my circumstance.  How do we reconcile the sovereignty of God and the goodness of God?  I guess the answer is faith...that His way may not be our way but His way is still the best way.  God is good, all the time.  All the time...

Refiner's Fire

Here's the thing:  I absolutely want to be His totally and completely...ruined for the name of Jesus.  My desire is to live radically marked by Christ in all areas of my life.  I know that I have a long way to go...(you may even have an opinion on how I am doing in that pursuit - I think that because I certainly have an opinion on how hard I think some people who talk a big game actually follow after Jesus - which goes back to having a long way to go...)  But I am trying to consciously ask Him about everything that I do, everything that I invest myself in, every decision that I make... 
This year that has led to leaving a job and pursuing His desire for me professionally...ending a ministry...and being part of an amazing women's conference.  It has also led to an intense, sometimes painful, look at my relationships.
He has asked me to examine friendships...rekindle old friendships...free myself from feeling like I have to be friends with people who are not worth the effort...seek new, fresh friendships...pursue a deep, meaningful relationship more fully.  And I want to be His.  So I am doing it.  But it isn't easy.  He has made clear that there is a friendship I want to invest in that is not His desire for me.  He has made it crystal clear.  He has even given me a glimpse into why it will not work out the way I want it to.  I can see His way is right...but it still hurts when He reminds me.
Living for Christ is marked by sacrifice.  His way is best...always.  I think I just wish, in this case, that what I want and what He wants for me lined up.

Marriage in The Message

So...I have a love/hate relationship with The Message.  It started out as hate but as I've learned more about it the more I love the way Eugene Peterson translates ancient text.  I think that I used to view it as a paraphrase...which is really what anyone who preaches or teaches Scripture gives when they preach or teach.  I now know that Mr Peterson did not take the NIV or any other translation and paraphrase but he began with the Hebrew and Greek manuscripts and translated them into the most modern use of the English language.  I respect his hard work...but I am not going to start using it as my study Bible. 

There are some amazing word pictures in The Message...like this one I heard last night in Bible study:

It's good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it's for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. - 1 Corinthians 7:2-6

I love some of the phrases and pictures looking at marriage this way gives me.  Marriage is not a place to stand up for your rights...it is a decision to serve.  It paints marriage as a strong, safe place when filled with service for one another...it also reminds me that Satan is prowling around looking for an opportunity to tempt.  God's design is always perfect...even when bringing together two imperfect people.  I love that about Him.

I fall hard upon soft grace...

July 14, 2011 Just a Little Sin? Lysa TerKeurst “Joseph went after his brothers and found them near Dothan. But they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him.” Genesis 37:17b-18 (NIV) Today, there will be a moment. No one will snap a picture of it. It probably won’t make it into the journals of those who journal. Or linger in the thoughts we carry with us to sleep tonight. It will come. It will go. It will slip by seemingly unnoticed. But its affects won’t slip. They’ll stay. And if fostered, grow to epic proportions. This moment where something creeps into our heart and pulls our focus from right to wrong. It will be just a hint of distortion. The smallest amount. But a slight and seemingly insignificant amount of skewed thought will take root. And grow. Beyond what you can even imagine. One of my favorite stories in the Bible is where Moses goes to Pharaoh and sings that song, “Oh Pharaoh, Pharaoh, woah ohhh, gotta let my people go. Huawh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.” Totally a loose translation, but you know what I’m talking about. But here’s an astounding chain of events to trace and consider. Why was the nation of Israel in captivity? Why was the entire nation of Israelites — all God’s people — all twelve tribes — enslaved in Egypt? As I trace this story backwards I find it’s because of one seemingly insignificant moment. The course of history was changed because a few family members got a little cranky and a little jealous of their brother Joseph. Envy and anger slipped in. Just a hint. But just enough. It doesn’t take much. Joseph was thrown in a pit and eventually sold as a slave. Years went by. Years of heartbreak and confusion passed. Eventually, Joseph landed in a position of great power in Egypt and had authority to provide food for his family. So, all 11 of his brothers and their families moved to Egypt. Joseph and his 11 brothers make up what became the 12 tribes of Israel. As these tribes multiplied they became the nation of Israel. What the brothers meant for evil, God used for good. He saved the Israelites from the famine. But there were still lasting effects of the brothers’ choices that came out years later. After Joseph died, “Then a new king, who did not know about Joseph, came to power in Egypt. ‘Look,’ he said to his people, ‘the Israelites have become much too numerous for us. Come, we must deal shrewdly with them or they will become even more numerous and, if war breaks out, will join our enemies, fight against us and leave the country.’ So they put slave masters over them to oppress them with forced labor, and they built Pithom and Rameses as store cities for Pharaoh. (Exodus 1:8-11) So, the entire nation of Israel suffered oppression and slavery. Why? Because a few brothers on an ordinary day got a little jealous and allowed anger and

envy to slip in.

And the moment it slipped in, the course of history changed.

In a moment.

May we never assume our moments don’t matter. The decisions we make every second of every day matter.

There are no little moments or little sins.

There is a domino affect to it all.

So, I fall hard upon soft grace. I thank God for this realization. I ask Him to make my soul even more sensitive, more aware, more in tune to my constant need for forgiveness.

Though I am weak, I walk in the strength of utter dependence.

And I refuse to beat myself up for mistakes made yesterday. Today is a new day. A new chance to set things going in a different direction.

Joseph’s brothers had years to try and rescue Joseph — find out where he was — help him — set their past mistakes right.

Years. They had years. But they never did set about to turn things around.

Oh sweet sister don’t let today slip by.

Moments matter.

Watch for a moment today where you are given the choice to let anger, envy or something else negative slip in. Recognize it. Refute it. And replace it with God’s spirit of love.

What I Would Tell Me at 12, 15 and 18...

What I would tell the 12 year old me...

• invest your heart in people who will care for it...even if they aren't the coolest kids in school
• be nicer to John
• Jesus loves you...just like you are - you are precious and priceless to Him and He is Who matters.

What I would tell the 15 year old me...

• take your recommitment to Christ a little more seriously
• pursue one of the older girls that you look up to so much at church...she probably has great advice about the next few years
• in a few months, you will meet a boy named Robert - RUN

What I would tell the 18 year old me...

• Holiness matters.  It matters so much to God and to you later.
• skip GSU...it is a waste of your time - high school was harder
• this boy is great but won't matter near as much as the next one...the next one will become part of you

so worth the read!!!

Getting Up Again Renee Swope

“…though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again…” Proverbs 24:16a, (NIV)

I’ve always admired people who aren’t afraid to fail. You know the ones who don’t even consider defeat when they blow it; people who see a personal setback as just another goal to conquer.
I’m not always so courageous. In fact, I can be really hard on myself when I fail, and it doesn’t even have to be a biggie. You see, I have what I call a “meanie in me” who replays my mistakes over and over, reminding me of how badly I’ve disappointed someone, or how impatient I was with my husband, or how harsh I was with my kids, or all sorts of ways that I fell short that day.
But the greatest defeat comes when I allow a mistake, a bad decision, sin, or a broken relationship to convince me that I might as well give up. Perhaps you have also allowed failure to knock you down, tie you up with the ropes of regret and hold you hostage like I have.
When I surveyed over 1200 women for my upcoming book, A Confident Heart, I discovered that our past failures, and our fear of failing again, are two of the biggest triggers that make us doubt ourselves.
Today’s key verse, Proverbs 24:16, has helped me release the regret, guilt, fear and shame that have weighed me down and held me back. Take a minute to read it now and notice how it says the righteous will fall. That is right. Even those of us who have received the gift of Christ’s righteousness and redemption will fall down. But we were never intended to stay down.
Instead of giving up Jesus empowers us to get up again.
In getting up, we can apologize and ask for forgiveness. In getting up, we can choose to try again with our kids, in our jobs, in our ministries, in our marriages, and in all of our mistakes. Because we trust that although we fall, God will help us up. Listen to His promise in Psalm 37:23-24 and as you read it insert your name in the blanks: “The steps of ____________ are established by the Lord, and He delights in ____________ way. When ____________ falls, __________ will not be hurled headlong, because the Lord is the One who holds ________ hand.” (NASB)
When we get up again failure can actually help us become the confident women God created us to be because it makes us stronger and better — when we go to God for help. Failure can stretch us to do more than we think we can and push us to try other methods of doing things when one way doesn’t work.
Yes, failure can be hurtful but it can also be beneficial. Failure produces wisdom when we ask for it and maturity when we learn from it.
The truth is, following Jesus is not about avoiding failures and being perfect. It’s about accepting our weaknesses and becoming more dependent on God’s perfect love and power at work in us. So the next time you fail to be the woman He calls you to be, or the woman you expect yourself to be, ask God to remind you of this truth.
We will sometimes fail to be who we want to be but we will get closer to who we are meant to be every time we fall and then choose to take God’s hand so we can get up again!

Bummer...

So, something happened recently that hurt my feelings.  I thought about a facebook status that would reveal the hurt but not those guilty and maybe elicit comments that would encourage me, justify my hurt feelings or keep someone from doing the same thing to someone else.  I didn't take it to facebook because (as I have mentioned in blogs before) I am not fond of people who try to send messages via the facebook status.  I think it hurts the wrong people and shows some amount of cowardice...and I think I can throw down Scripture to support not airing out grievances via facebook. 
BUT that didn't keep me from coming up with the perfect status to express my thoughts and feelings.  As I over-analyzed the hurt, the people responsible and then mulled over that perfect phrase, I realized I am guilty of the very thing that hurt my feelings.
Conviction stinks...but without it, we don't grow.  We never begin to look more like Christ.  If we choose to ignore conviction or never have it, how can we claim to be in a relationship with Jesus?  A relationship is a two way street.  Conviction is the Spirit walking that street...am I going to take a walk with Him?

The Race

My Bible study group is reading through a book called Becoming More than Just a Good Bible Study Girl.  Even just the title has had me thinking about pursuing God.  His nature is pursuant.  He is constantly pursuing our hearts and longing for our purity and sanctification.  Am I that committed to pursuing Him?
The temptation in our relationship with God is to decide we have come as far as we can...or want to be...or as far as we are willing to change...or as far as our parents went with God...to be just a good Bible study girl.  Stagnacy kills any relationship.  We call it a rut.  Doing the same thing over and over...standing still instead of growing...looking at an obstacle instead of moving beyond it.
The challenge is in never being satisfied with who we are in relation to Christ.  He constantly wants to know us more...He wants us to pursue Him the way He pursues us.  The Christian life is a race...a journey toward Zion.  You can't get where you are headed or win the race if you are standing still. 
Scripture talks about growing in our faith...moving from infancy to maturity.  Am I headed that way?  Am I constantly taking in the food of the mature? 

Hebrews 5:13-14 Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good

I would hate to become content in my relationship with God...the point where conviction doesn't prick my heart or I turn from the change He is asking me to make...where I think that He is finished with me.  How prideful.  Conviction is painful...the starting point of pruning...the tool that leads to refining our faith.  But I welcome it...even ask for it.  After all, I am in this race to win it.

Hebrews 12:1 let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

FAB: Why We Should Care About What We Wear

I have been wondering about why women should care about what they wear.  Sometimes, I think it is about putting your best foot forward...which is definitely the case.  Sometimes, I think it is being taken seriously by the people you come into contact with...which is true.  Sometimes I think it is about trying to find the beauty in all women...which is a huge motivation. 
But I began to wonder about why I care.  I wonder why it matters to me that I look my best.  I really think it is about how I feel about myself.  When I have on an outfit that I love, I feel confident.  Confidence is a HUGE game changer in any one's appearance.  Most men, and women for that matter, will say that confidence is the most attractive quality a woman can have...but it is not a quality most women naturally possess.  A great outfit can give you that feeling of extra confidence because you are rocking an outfit that you love.
Like today, I love my outfit.  I don't necessarily think it is the best I have ever looked, but I am definitely rocking an outfit that I love.  I got a pedicure yesterday, and my toes are painted in a bright royal blue.  I have a dress that is the same color to which I added a great nude wedge sandal and white jean jacket.  Then my favorite thing...jewelry.  I added a pink touch with tons of silver and some pearl accents.  I LOVE it!
A great outfit makes me walk with purpose, smile more and approach people I might not when I am feeling less confident.  That is why we should care about what we wear...it can change how we feel.

Fashion Quick Hits:

• Think about proportion.  If you are heavier on top, think about how to balance out your bottom half, like with a brighter color or a trouser jean.  Mr. Gru (Despicable Me) or a lollipop should never be your fashion goal or style icon.  If you are heavier on the bottom, wearing a bright or form fitting top will balance you out better...save the blacks, browns and dark blues for your pants. 
• If you have fine hair, try this: condition your hair and then shampoo it.  Sounds backward, I know.  I need the conditioning help from my daily conditioner; shampooing second washes away the residue without the benefit of the conditioner.  It will make your hair feel healthier and give it the bounce you want in a volumizing shampoo/conditioner set.
• Nail colors that are crazy popular right now are bright fuchsia, coral and gray.  If you want a dark every season color other than black, try eggplant - OPI's Lincoln Park After Dark is a great one. 
• Remember nail polish is a great way to keep up with the colors or trends of the season without having to dump a ton of money into new wardrobe choices that will not be popular in a few months.  Your wardrobe should have colors that look great on you; accessorize with trends.
• A great haircut can make a world of difference in your appearance.  Take care of your hair!

Confessions

• I am loving Happy Endings.  It is not quite Friends good, but it fills my sitcom void...until Troy and I start watching 30 Rock this summer.  30 Rock is going to be the one show that Justin is always asking us if we watch that we are going to try.
• I am getting frustrated with the way women feel the need to compete.
• I am not thrilled with the thought of Troy fighting in the US Open this year.  Jason says he would not put him in the ring if he did not feel like Troy was ready...and I trust Jason...but still.
• I love some of the new friendships that I have the wonderful opportunity to begin.  I also feel like I have let a few intentional friendships become less intentional...to the betterment of one and detriment of the other.  I really want to learn the balance of that.
• Speaking of friends and Jason, I always forget how much I miss talking to him until I have the opportunity to say more than two words to him.  I wish that relationship didn't have so much drama around it.
• I realized one of the reasons I love Bible study and the girls in it so much is my love language, quality time.  I really don't think there is a way to spend time with other people that is of higher quality than discussing the Word of God.  So that time means tons to me...which translates into feeling love for the people there.  I just need to learn to reconcile the emotion when people don't come with my firm belief that God brings who He wants to each study.
• I wrote this in a blog awhile ago and was reminded of it when checking facebook today: The facebook status is a crazy thing. It is fun to update people on life's happenings and makes informing lots of people at once really easy. Sometimes we use them to share something we are learning or encourage someone specific. Unfortunately, so many people have begun using the status as a way to send a hurtful message to someone specific. Sometimes thinly veiled...sometimes thick with mystery. We are creating a passive aggressive way to attack people. God has really been teaching me how dangerous it is...how it can damage relationships. For the one person the message was meant, there are hundreds it wasn't...but they don't know that. If you don't have anything nice to say...

FAB: Things I Love

InStyle

I am loving InStyle right now.  I have a subscription (that I got at a great price through the Girl Scouts yearly magazine sales), but I am also loving their facebook page and website.  If you are interested in fashion, beauty or keeping up with trends, these are great resources.  All three sources have tips and fun things to learn or participate in.  The website even has a game that lets you play fashion stylist!  For me, it is a great escape from things that can weigh me down.  It is pure fun and ends up teaching me tons also.

The Grace of God by Andy Stanley

Our Sunday school class just read through this book together.  I like Andy a lot.  I have heard him speak both live and on video several times.  He is well spoken and very knowledgeable.  This is the first book of his that I have read.  I really loved his writing style.  He weaves the Bible with present day issues.  Each chapter takes a look at the grace of God in the life of a Bible character.  He reminds us that we are not so different than those characters in the Word that we look up to or down on.  God's grace extends to all and covers all.  Stanley brings up aspects of grace that I have not thought about before and reminded me of my favorite parts of God's gift that is grace.  I did not always agree with what he says, but I appreciate being challenged to think.

Biolage Daily Leave-in Tonic

My hair is very fine, but I have tons of it...which is wonderful, but it gets very tangled.  I went through a time when combing my hair was my least favorite part of my day.  I broke several combs trying to tame this crazy head of hair.  I was talking to my mom about it, and she recommended this fabulous product.  A few sprays on wet hair makes it so easy to comb through.  I don't even need conditioner every day.  Sometimes, I shampoo and use the daily tonic in place of traditional conditioner.  I love the product because I don't really put styling products in my hair.  Fine hair does not handle product residue well.  My hair can also tend toward being oily...which also does not take product well.  It will get oily and fall flat quickly so any product is iffy in my hair anyway.  This one works great!  I can comb through my hair easily and not have a greasy feeling in my hair all day.

SOME TIPS TO THINK ABOUT FOR READING THE BIBLE…

Troy found these and shared them with the group at our church that is reading Thru the Bible this year.  I loved them and wanted to share!

• Adopt the motto, “No Bible - No food.” Don’t allow yourself to eat breakfast until you have first read at least a verse from the Bible.
• Take a small Bible with you to the gym…before you start your rigorous workout sit on a stationary bike, pedal lightly and read a few verses during your warm up.
• When your wife asks you to go shopping with her, instead of letting it ruin your day, slide a Bible into your back pocket and find a nice comfortable place to sit and read while she decides between the black pants or the white ones or maybe the red ones. Ladies can also adopt this tactic when asked to go to a gun show.
• Give up one T.V. show to read the Bible
• Go to a place you like and look forward to each week and read your Bible there. For example, go to Starbucks every Monday afternoon, get a tall white chocolate mocha, and read a chapter of the Bible. Great for getting through those dreadful Mondays. Reward yourself with a treat and with God’s truth.
• Download an audio Bible to your iPod
• Write a Bible verse on a 3×5 card and keep the card in your back pocket, occasionally pull it out during the day and memorize the verse. I did this in college while walking across campus from one class to the next, it was a great way to focus on the Bible throughout the day.
• The Bible tells us one of the roles of the Holy Spirit is to teach us the Word of God. Pray that the Spirit would help you see and live out what you read.
• Give it time to soak. Meditation is an important aspect of Bible reading. Read over the same portion of Scripture many times during one sitting for deeper understanding.
• Find someone who seems to know and live out the Bible better than you do and then ask that person questions.
• If you are reading the Bible with a friend or with a spouse, talk about what you are each interested in right now. These topics can really help guide you into what portions of the Bible to read.
• Christian book stores are filled with Bible study guides on a plethora of topics. Some of them are centered on certain topics while others walk you through studying a certain book of the Bible or a certain larger section of Scripture.
• Keep it fresh. Shake things up, instead of reading from the NIV like every other morning spend the week reading from The Message or from the New Living Translation. Or spend a day doing your reading at a park instead of at your kitchen table.
• Set up a consistent time every day to read the Bible. If you try to read through the Bible every year without a consistent time it just won’t happen. If you shoot for nothing you’ll hit it every time.
• Pick out a Bible that will fit your lifestyle. If you are constantly on the go, make sure you have a Bible that will fit in your back pocket or purse. If you are at home and do a lot of your reading at home, get a larger Bible that lays nice and flat with some helpful study notes. If your eyes aren’t that good, don’t buy a Bible with small print, you’ll never read it. Get a Bible that fits your lifestyle and is easy for you to read and understand. 

FAB: Met Gala Fashion

So I don't really know what the purpose of the Metropolitan Costume Institute Gala is but, every year, tons of stars go and fashion is why. So here is my take on the nights big winners and losers.

Big trend of the night was long sleeve dresses.  I liked most of the attempts to pull this off.  Here is my top three:

I love when people have personal style.  I wanted to hate this dress until I realized it is what I should expect from Christina Ricci.

So I also generally appreciate Michelle Williams style even if I don't like it because she is true to herself.  But this time I can't like it because I HATE birds.

I think I would love Alicia's dress if she wasn't wearing the jacket.  I am not sure that I understand what she is going for.

So I looked at this dress for a long time because I think she looks beautiful but at the same time I did not like the over all dress that much.  I tried to decide why and came up with the fact that I think she could have done without giving the illusion that she is showing the world half of her naked body.  She can look beautiful without that.

Ok.  I have to admit that to only choose three worst dressed ladies I had to remove the people who were wearing just plain crazy things and assume that these people were actually trying and missed the mark.

Now for Best Dressed of the night.  Here are my top five looks!



Sounding Off: Breastfeeding in Public

So, tonight we went to Applebees for dinner (after seeing Rio - it was cute!).  I thought that the you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me highlight of my night would be seeing a dude wearing more jewelry than this guy.



But then a group of people walked in - two moms with infants and a family of four.  They came to a large table behind us...leading the group to the table was the family of four with the mom actively breastfeeding a child that is probably a few months shy of a year old.  She was wearing a v-necked sleeveless dress that she had pulled down to leave one breast exposed for the child.  She had no blanket covering herself and made no attempt to cover herself even after sitting at the table.

SO many questions popped into my head.  First, how did this happen?  At what point did she begin breastfeeding....to the degree that she had to walk around the resturant doing so.  Second, why would she make the people with her feel so uncomfortable?  Their whole group became the focus of so much attention.  Lastly, what is up with her man?  Troy would never want me to share with the world something so private.

Let me make a confession.  I did not love breastfeeding.  It hurt, and I hated leaking.  In fact, I disliked it so much with Nate that I didn't even try with Ian.  That being said, I don't have a problem with other people doing it.  One of my favorite friends, Bethany, has breastfed each of her boys for a year, which is wonderful.  I am kind of in the to-each-her-own camp on this one. 

Bethany came up when Troy and I talked about this woman later.  We have both been in the room with Bethany breastfeeding (either at her house or the church) but have never seen it because she uses a blanket.  Neither of us have been offended or uncomfortable in anyway.  But this woman offended me.

I think that I am just still shocked that a woman would be so willing to expose herself in such a way...in public...in front of anyone other than her husband, in fact.  Both Troy and I were happy that our children, specifically our boys, did not see her.  Talk about something you don't want to talk about over dinner.  I honestly don't think I would mind seeing a woman breastfeeding in a resturant if she is using a blanket or some other cover-up for modesty.  Yes, breastfeeding is normal and natural, but they are called private parts for a reason.