2 Poems by My Favorite Author

As For Me As for me and my house
We will serve the Lord.
As for me and my walk
Christ and I are in one accord.
As for me and my heart
Inside is only love.
As for me and my sight
It will only look above.
As for me and my brain
Christ will always be the thought.
As for me and my sin,
That, Christ has already bought.
As for me and my zeal,
Only for Christ it will be.
As for me and my chains,
Christ has set me free
 
Walking the Road

I’m walking along the lonely road
Not a care to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

What should I say? What should I believe?
He says He died for me
Me, I say?
Your sins I died to relieve.

I’m walking along the lonely road
Many cares to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

It’s my way, I know where I am going
It’s my life, my vocation, my route
I can row my own boat thank you
I know where the river’s flowing.
I’m walking along the lonely road
Many cares to see
Jesus comes up to me many times
Can I please set you free?

He comes to me again, a hard time in life…
He comforts me when I tell Him not to
Who is this Man to me?
I realize that He is not just a Man
Who died for me long ago
Lord Jesus be my Guide, and please set me free.

by Troy Borst

Our Words...yikes!

I read this in a blog recently:

Beth Moore had quoted Melissa (her daughter) as saying that most of the time what we mean by ‘real’ is something negative. That struck me like a ton of bricks because something very similar was already in my teaching notes for that night and I took it as divine affirmation I was potentially on the right track.
The point I suggested was that if we find ourselves ending sentences with “I’m just saying”, it may be that what we just said wasn’t our just being real, it was our being real mean. The one who prides herself on ‘telling it like it is” may just need to repent of hatefulness rather than glory in her plain-spokenness. If we are fully aware that we are abrasive and hurting feelings on a regular basis, it’s not the public-at-large’s responsibility to learn to deal with us and our ‘authenticity’. Does that mean our criticisms are unfounded? Not always. But there is a world of difference between speaking truth in love and spewing the truth in hate.

I saw Beth's original tweet with Melissa's comment about people who are being "real" and loved it, but Lisa's following comments just further emphasized the truth of Melissa's words.  Sometimes we think that people who say what everyone else is thinking are refreshing.  But I wonder if the reason everyone else is just thinking it and not saying it is because it is hurtful.
What we like about people who say those often painful truths is that the words were said but that we don't take the hit as having said it.  Often those that "tell it like it is" tout the quality as being brave enough to speak the truth.  I love that Lisa points out the the criticism is often founded.  Harsh words maybe truthful, but are they beneficial?
This past week in Bible study we were studying and then talked about being disciplined.  One area that we talked about having Godly discipline is our words.  Talk about a challenge...especially for women.  Learning to control the tongue is so difficult.  Scripture speaks to it in so many places but so clearly here in James.

James 3:2-12 We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.  All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. 

Even if you can slow yourself and your emotions down enough to think through encounters you know will be difficult or give opportunity to glorify the flesh rather than God, the reactionary words...ones spoken before they are thought about, will just about kill you if you are consiously trying to change the way you speak.  I have tried to learn to ask myself if what I want to say is beneficial to the person or situation involved.  I am trying to learn to stop and think...pray and ask that question when my immediate emotional reaction feels ungodly. Those two disciplines can be so frustrating because I often end up unable to say what I think or feel...but I guess if my thoughts and feelings were not beneficial or Godly I should be ok with that, huh?  I don't want to say them.
Sometimes, there are hard things that should be said in love and trying to figure out when those times are is hard.  I have learned to pray that God would show me when He wants me to speak by having the other person ask my opinion.  So many times that never happens. They never ask. But, sometimes, we are the person God wants to use to speak His Truth into a situation, and they will ask...then, it is right.  I remember there was one case where someone I love was really wandering far from the Lord. I had such a broken heart over it for my Savior.  I prayed so many times God help me keep my mouth shut until Your time if that ever or never comes.  And then one day he asked me what I thought...I went bug-eyed.  I looked at Troy.  He laughed and said that's what you have been waiting for...go ahead.  The conversation was so blessed by God.
I don't want to be pleased when someone else is hurt by words...mine or someone else's.  The telling it like it is moment of satisfaction is not worth the slip in being disciplined with my words.  A brave woman is a woman of Godly discipline who speaks with love in His time.  I'm just sayin...

Surrendering Hurt Feelings???

So, last night my feelings were hurt.  I got hit right in the love language =(  I'd like to say that I was over it quickly...but that's obviously not the case since I am blogging it this morning.  And, unfortunately, it is going to get worse before it gets better. I think that I understand His purpose in this particular hurt, but understanding doesn't make the situation hurt less. What I would like to know is where do I take this hurt?  How can I react in a way that glorifies God when my feelings are hurt?  How do I cast my cares on Him?  How do I take on His easy yoke and light burden?  I understand that I need to surrender my hurt feelings to Him.  But how do I do that?  No, really...I'm asking.  I've prayed, consulted Scripture, talked it out...how do I surrender these feelings?

Wouldn't it be nice if we could go through life without ever getting our feelings hurt?  Sounds like heaven to me!

It's all good...

I have been thinking a lot about the goodness of God recently.  It is easy to think God is good when things are good.  My life is really good right now.  My kids are happy and making quality friendships with little people who have parents that Troy and I adore.  Troy is chasing professional dreams.  He is BUSY, but he is able to focus on himself right now.  After 2 years of focusing on our children, I know he is happy to be back to a more normal schedule that allows him to focus on work and school.  I LOVE my new job...not a little - a lot.  Good people, fun tasks and laughter...I love the church.  Being there restores my soul.
But what about when life is not good?  When life is hard, do I trust in the goodness of God?  Knowing that God is good is different than feeling that God is good.  When circumstance weigh us down with stress, discontent, unhappiness, depression, frustration, despair, grief, regret, sadness, anger...do I view my life through the heart, mind and eyes of someone who knows that God is good?  That is what faith is, right?  Living life with the knowledge that God is good, that He loves you and that He wants us to know His goodness in abundance.
God is always good...but He is not always sweet.  We face bitter circumstances...life is full of hard things.  Can I believe that God is good even when He is not sweet?  When death comes, when time passes with no answer, when people I love hurt, when provision doesn't come...even then do I know that He is good?  That He is being good to me...that He is working good for me?  Do I live standing firm in the head knowledge and the heart experience that He is not only sovereign but good?
I think that is the catch, isn't it?  He is sovereign.  He reigns.  He can do all things...including change my circumstance.  How do we reconcile the sovereignty of God and the goodness of God?  I guess the answer is faith...that His way may not be our way but His way is still the best way.  God is good, all the time.  All the time...

Refiner's Fire

Here's the thing:  I absolutely want to be His totally and completely...ruined for the name of Jesus.  My desire is to live radically marked by Christ in all areas of my life.  I know that I have a long way to go...(you may even have an opinion on how I am doing in that pursuit - I think that because I certainly have an opinion on how hard I think some people who talk a big game actually follow after Jesus - which goes back to having a long way to go...)  But I am trying to consciously ask Him about everything that I do, everything that I invest myself in, every decision that I make... 
This year that has led to leaving a job and pursuing His desire for me professionally...ending a ministry...and being part of an amazing women's conference.  It has also led to an intense, sometimes painful, look at my relationships.
He has asked me to examine friendships...rekindle old friendships...free myself from feeling like I have to be friends with people who are not worth the effort...seek new, fresh friendships...pursue a deep, meaningful relationship more fully.  And I want to be His.  So I am doing it.  But it isn't easy.  He has made clear that there is a friendship I want to invest in that is not His desire for me.  He has made it crystal clear.  He has even given me a glimpse into why it will not work out the way I want it to.  I can see His way is right...but it still hurts when He reminds me.
Living for Christ is marked by sacrifice.  His way is best...always.  I think I just wish, in this case, that what I want and what He wants for me lined up.

Marriage in The Message

So...I have a love/hate relationship with The Message.  It started out as hate but as I've learned more about it the more I love the way Eugene Peterson translates ancient text.  I think that I used to view it as a paraphrase...which is really what anyone who preaches or teaches Scripture gives when they preach or teach.  I now know that Mr Peterson did not take the NIV or any other translation and paraphrase but he began with the Hebrew and Greek manuscripts and translated them into the most modern use of the English language.  I respect his hard work...but I am not going to start using it as my study Bible. 

There are some amazing word pictures in The Message...like this one I heard last night in Bible study:

It's good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it's for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. - 1 Corinthians 7:2-6

I love some of the phrases and pictures looking at marriage this way gives me.  Marriage is not a place to stand up for your rights...it is a decision to serve.  It paints marriage as a strong, safe place when filled with service for one another...it also reminds me that Satan is prowling around looking for an opportunity to tempt.  God's design is always perfect...even when bringing together two imperfect people.  I love that about Him.

I fall hard upon soft grace...

July 14, 2011 Just a Little Sin? Lysa TerKeurst “Joseph went after his brothers and found them near Dothan. But they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him.” Genesis 37:17b-18 (NIV) Today, there will be a moment. No one will snap a picture of it. It probably won’t make it into the journals of those who journal. Or linger in the thoughts we carry with us to sleep tonight. It will come. It will go. It will slip by seemingly unnoticed. But its affects won’t slip. They’ll stay. And if fostered, grow to epic proportions. This moment where something creeps into our heart and pulls our focus from right to wrong. It will be just a hint of distortion. The smallest amount. But a slight and seemingly insignificant amount of skewed thought will take root. And grow. Beyond what you can even imagine. One of my favorite stories in the Bible is where Moses goes to Pharaoh and sings that song, “Oh Pharaoh, Pharaoh, woah ohhh, gotta let my people go. Huawh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.” Totally a loose translation, but you know what I’m talking about. But here’s an astounding chain of events to trace and consider. Why was the nation of Israel in captivity? Why was the entire nation of Israelites — all God’s people — all twelve tribes — enslaved in Egypt? As I trace this story backwards I find it’s because of one seemingly insignificant moment. The course of history was changed because a few family members got a little cranky and a little jealous of their brother Joseph. Envy and anger slipped in. Just a hint. But just enough. It doesn’t take much. Joseph was thrown in a pit and eventually sold as a slave. Years went by. Years of heartbreak and confusion passed. Eventually, Joseph landed in a position of great power in Egypt and had authority to provide food for his family. So, all 11 of his brothers and their families moved to Egypt. Joseph and his 11 brothers make up what became the 12 tribes of Israel. As these tribes multiplied they became the nation of Israel. What the brothers meant for evil, God used for good. He saved the Israelites from the famine. But there were still lasting effects of the brothers’ choices that came out years later. After Joseph died, “Then a new king, who did not know about Joseph, came to power in Egypt. ‘Look,’ he said to his people, ‘the Israelites have become much too numerous for us. Come, we must deal shrewdly with them or they will become even more numerous and, if war breaks out, will join our enemies, fight against us and leave the country.’ So they put slave masters over them to oppress them with forced labor, and they built Pithom and Rameses as store cities for Pharaoh. (Exodus 1:8-11) So, the entire nation of Israel suffered oppression and slavery. Why? Because a few brothers on an ordinary day got a little jealous and allowed anger and

envy to slip in.

And the moment it slipped in, the course of history changed.

In a moment.

May we never assume our moments don’t matter. The decisions we make every second of every day matter.

There are no little moments or little sins.

There is a domino affect to it all.

So, I fall hard upon soft grace. I thank God for this realization. I ask Him to make my soul even more sensitive, more aware, more in tune to my constant need for forgiveness.

Though I am weak, I walk in the strength of utter dependence.

And I refuse to beat myself up for mistakes made yesterday. Today is a new day. A new chance to set things going in a different direction.

Joseph’s brothers had years to try and rescue Joseph — find out where he was — help him — set their past mistakes right.

Years. They had years. But they never did set about to turn things around.

Oh sweet sister don’t let today slip by.

Moments matter.

Watch for a moment today where you are given the choice to let anger, envy or something else negative slip in. Recognize it. Refute it. And replace it with God’s spirit of love.